Immature

I thought that being 21 and older will make you grow mature.


I am wrong.

Yeah, true, it's just a number, but if I give you RM 1 compared to RM 100,000. Which will be of greater significance?

So, no matter what people say, 21 is still a significant number. I believe that adulthood don't start at 16 or 18 or 21. It starts when you take real responsibility and don't act like a child anymore. But being 21 is the time where people don't tell you: "Grow up!" or just shake their heads and say, "You're still young, you'll understand someday."

Being 20 and above is when people expect you to not act like a spoiled brat.

But nobody cares.


So we are still immature from time to time.

I know I am.

Cause I lack wisdom. So I say when I shouldn't say, and not say when I should say. I say wrong things, do wrong things and think I am very smart sometimes.

I still want to be a kid sometimes. I don't like being a grownup. It's burdensome and it involves lots of change.


But when I look at proper, mature adults around me, even young adults who are slightly more mature...I see a different kind of attractiveness they draw people. Yeah, babies got their cuteness and their baby habits to make people go, "Awwww....so cute." Every stage has their own kind of attractiveness. The adult stage too. The things they will say, the things they will do, and how they conduct (I'm talking about proper, mature adults. There are quite a number of immature adults.) is different and makes me want to be like them.


And I compare myself and whoa...I'm really far from that. I may look mature, I may sound sometimes mature, but I find myself totally the opposite.


Nope, part-time work did not polish me much. Nor did Form 6. Though I am grateful I am more or less more mature in someways. Nevertheless, I want to be more mature. At the same time, I don't want to be more mature.


I've said it once, I'll say it again: 人, 永遠都是最矛盾地. (People are always the most contradictory beings.)


I am glad my assignments are quite over...only 7% to go. I just hope for the life of me, that I don't get anymore unexpected surprises.



I do despise group assignments. Who's with me?