艺人的路

(简体字版)

今天真的是有点打开眼界。。。

圣诞节刚过，台湾的基督徒们肯定也有庆祝吧。

那，台湾的基督徒艺人呢？

事实上，我真的不晓得台湾基督徒艺人有谁。除了林俊杰，李玖哲，陶吉吉（哲），F.I.R, 范玮琪，何耀珊与黑人陈建州此外，真的不晓得还有哪个艺人是基督徒。

不过，如果认真地去查，其实还蛮多也。多得有点不可思议。。。

我发现，除了我刚才所说的艺人之外，原来还有。。。

王力宏，潘玮柏，黄嘉千，张韶涵，伍柏，品冠，梁静茹，张信哲，吴建豪，张惠妹 （天主教），信乐团中的Chris, 光良，玺恩， 同恩。。。等等等。。。

还有周杰伦的妈妈叶惠美！不知道周董是不是嘞？


所谓的基督徒艺人真的不容易当也。想想看，他们如果真的是为了主而活，他们所受的压力也不少。奇怪的是，当基督徒时更被其他人盯着看。我们的一举一动都不可以逃过他们的眼光。这不是特地做好事给大家看，而是我们的生命当信了主就真的很受人家的重视。一旦行动说话有差错了就有旁观者指着手指，大声小声地批评着，“哎呀，这是基督徒应当表现的态度吗？”

所有基督徒，不管艺人还是凡人， 都一定要真实地活出一个像耶稣所说的，“你们是世上的光。城造在山上是不能隐藏的。”

我不是因为这样就叫基督徒们放弃。相反地，如果基督徒们真的是爱主的话，就更不能放弃。因为凡事靠主必能完成， 因为是他赐力量给我们。（腓4：13）

不管是艺人还是凡人，每个做基督徒的都不能放弃做世上的光。路有时候看起来会很漫长，走久了觉得超累。但我们一定要记得，有许多基督徒们在其他地方都也在走着这条路。

虽然我不会赞成这些基督徒艺人的某些行为，但我不是来批评，而是来劝励他们，因为我知道，做艺人已经不容易了，何况是做信主的艺人。

如果你是一位基督徒而你觉得基督徒不应该做艺人，我想说：“我觉得你错了。” 因为艺人在镜头前虽然看起来很风采，很天王天后之感觉，但很多艺人在私底下都想寻找一个更充裕的人生。所以我觉得爱主而又被他赐天分的人应该用他们的实力天分在演艺圈，歌坛里做世上的光。我怎么知道呢？因为艺人与凡人并没有差别，只多了一个名称和更多人的重视罢了。


你们可能说因为我也有想做艺人的梦，所以才这么说了。可能是，但那种想法也错了吗？不妨告诉我错在哪儿？我只想写歌，写剧本，做导演等罢了。我唱歌没那么厉害，舞蹈更不用说了，演艺也好不了哪里，别说样貌身材了。。。我成得了艺人吗？这是上帝叫我去我才能去当的呀。我想不一定会成真的哦！

话说回来，我们一定要为这些基督徒艺人祷告哦，因为如果只做挂名的基督徒而不做真正世上的光，那有多遗憾呀！那时候，这些所谓基督徒艺人只是做有道德行为的人罢了。

真的，我不是在批评或责骂这些基督徒艺人。因为我们全都已犯罪， 好也好不了哪里。但我是真得很想提醒这些基督徒艺人，一定要坚持为主站稳，不要被世界的虚伪闪耀给骗了。 俗语说，你爬得越高，你跌得更痛。

所以，艺人啊艺人, 一定要为主而活哦！加油！而且我们这些基督徒们也会为你们祷告，希望全世界的人都可以认识与相信我们的主耶稣基督！


(繁體字版)

今天真的是有點大開眼界…

聖誕節剛過, 台灣的基督徒們肯定也有慶祝吧.

那, 台灣的基督徒藝人呢?

事實上, 我真的不曉得台灣基督徒藝人有誰. 除了林俊杰, 李玖哲, 陶喆, F.I.R, 范瑋琪, 何耀珊與黑人陳建州此外, 真的不曉得還有哪個藝人是基督徒.

不過, 如果認真地去查,其實還蠻多也. 多得有點不可思議…

我發現, 除了我剛才所說的藝人之外, 原來還有…

王力宏, 潘瑋柏, 黃嘉千, 張韶涵, 伍佰, 品冠, 梁靜茹, 張信哲, 吳建豪, 張惠妹 (天主教), 信樂團中的Chris, 光良, 璽恩, 同恩…等等等…

還有周杰倫的媽媽葉惠美! 不知道周董是不是嘞?

所謂的基督徒藝人真的不容易當也. 想想看, 他們如果真的是為了主而活, 他們所受的壓力也不少. 奇怪的是, 當基督徒是更被其他人盯著看. 我們的一舉一動都不可以逃過他們的眼光. 這不是特地做好事給大家看, 而是我們的生命當信了主就真的很受人家的重視. 一旦行動說話有差錯了就有旁觀者指著手指, 大聲小聲地批評著, “哎呀, 這是基督徒應當表現的態度嗎?”

所有基督徒, 不管藝人還是凡人, 都一定要真實地活出一個像耶穌所說的, “你們是世上的光. 城造在山上是不能隱藏的.”

我不是因為這樣就叫基督徒們放棄. 相反地, 如果基督徒們真的是愛主的話, 就更不能放棄. 因為凡事靠主必能完成, 因為是祂賜力量給我們. (腓 4:13)

不管是藝人還是凡人, 每個做基督徒的都不能放棄做世上的光. 路有時候看起來會很漫長, 走久了覺得超累. 但我們一定要記得, 有許多基督徒們在其他地方都也在走著這條路.

雖然我不會贊成這些基督徒藝人的某些行為, 但我不是來批評, 而是來勸勵他們, 因為我知道, 做藝人已經不容易了, 何況是做信主的藝人.

如果你是一位基督徒而你覺得基督徒不應該做藝人, 我想說: “我覺得你錯了.” 因為藝人在鏡頭前雖然看起來很風采, 很天王天后之感覺, 但很多藝人在私底下都想尋找一個更充裕的人生. 所以我覺得愛主而又被祂賜天分的人應該用他們的實力天分在演藝圈, 歌壇里做世上的光. 我怎麼知道呢? 因為藝人與凡人並沒有差別, 只多了一個名稱和更多人的重視罷了.

你們可能說因為我也有想做藝人的夢, 所以才這麼說了. 可能是, 但那種想法也錯了嗎? 不妨告訴我錯在哪兒? 我只想寫歌, 寫劇本, 做導演等罷了. 我唱歌沒那麼厲害, 舞蹈更不用說了, 演藝也好不了哪裡,別說樣貌身材了…我成的了藝人嗎? 這是上帝叫我去我才能去當的呀. 我想不一定會成真的哦!

話說回來, 我們一定要為這些基督徒藝人禱告哦, 因為如果只做掛名的基督徒而不做真正世上的光, 那有多遺憾呀! 那時候, 這些所謂基督徒藝人只是做有道德行為的人罷了.

真的, 我不是在批評或責罵這些基督徒藝人. 因為我們全都已犯罪, 好也好不了哪裡. 但我是真的很想提醒這些基督徒藝人, 一定要堅持為主站穩, 不要被世界的虛偽閃耀給騙了. 俗語說, 你爬得越高, 你跌得更痛.

所以, 藝人啊藝人, 一定要為主而活哦! 加油! 而且我們這些基督徒們也會為你們禱告, 希望全世界的人都可以認識與相信我們的主耶穌基督!

(English version..)

No, I'm just kidding. It's gonna a bit tough to rewrite this in English again. :) Will talk about it another time. But this post is aimed to all Taiwanese and Chinese Christians!

Photoblogging

For the next few posts, it will be more of a photoblog.

So, enjoy the pictures...some are interesting, some are boring...yeah yeah.

And countdown is coming! 2008 2008 2008...

Singapore restaurants seemed to love repeating their names twice. For example, in Night Safari, you will find the restaurant Ulu Ulu (this restaurant name will not work in Malaysia, I think.), and somewhere in Orchard you will find Oscar Oscar. In City Hall that area, you'll find New York New York...so next time if I ever open one restaurant in Singapore, I should repeat the name...like Eat Drink Eat Drink...okay, that was uncreative.

Singapore was celebrating their Christmas...though the lights are more than KL, but this year's Christmas decorations seem to be a little less festive. Why ah why ah?

However, Robinsons and Orchard Road doesn't rest, thence the intricate foam and polystyrene swirls and curls and reindeers reindeers.

Wait for Part Duo...:)

Weekful

Capture...snap...

Lots of pictures to show!

But without me.


Hahahaha...


I already said I am behind the camera kind of person.

Well, to let you in on a small secret...

Next time I will post up more pictures...hopefully. :)



So, take care! Will blog before the year ends...2008 rocks!

Now watching They Kiss Again...yup! The sequel of It Started With A Kiss! And it is quite faithful to the manga...so... :) The irony is Ariel Lin speaks perfect English but her character in the show knows nothing of English and need her on-screen husband to teach her...

But I think the lovemaking scene is a little overdone.

Shall not spoil too much. Hehe...I know, I'm still watching Angela Zhang's Romantic Princess...man..too many shows and I still got tons of assignments to do. Hehehe...procrastinate procrastinate.

Btw, I think Jay Chou's performance in Initial D was okay, fits his selamba character...but when his girlfriend kissed him, and his hand gripping the car door...gosh. Super overdone and fake. Han Ji Hye did it better when she was kissed in The Secret Lovers.

Why am I giving reviews of old stuff? :)

So nice right, this building?

Joy

Will not be around in Malaysia for the next few days...

So, blessed Christmas!

picture from prague-pictures.cz

Remember that Christmas is the time for joyous reunions and family time...other than the day that Christ was said to be born...(let's just say He is born on the 25th December.)

So, know what's Christmas is about!

Christmas is about joy, love, peace!

It is the tidings of comfort and joy, the day where people sing 'Feliz Navidad', 'Hark the Herald Angels Sing', 'Silent Night', 'O Come O Come Emmanuel'..where people celebrate the birth of Jesus, the Saviour of the world, the very manifestation of a loving God! And always remember: God never change! He is love, means He is love!

Do join DUMC for a Christmas celebration at 10 a.m. on Christmas Day, 25 December 2007 @ Dream Center!


And then..watch all those heartwarming Hallmark Christmas movies...

And then...eat candy canes and gingerbread men...


OOHHH...gingerbread man!

picture from raspberry.co.uk

So yummy!!

And..."catch a falling star and put it in the pocket, never let it fade away...."

And..."all I want for Christmas.....is you......"

Guess which show that has both lines in it? :)



Again, God bless ye merry gentlemen and ladies! Join a Christmas celebration. You'd be blessed. Truly. Just to listen to the choir sing or the congregation sing...beat sitting at home and doing nothing. Or sleep.

"let it snow..let it snow...."

Oh The Wonders.

I have resolved to do everything and nothing.

I have resolved to write everything and nothing.

I have resolved to strike a balance between writing for an assignment and writing for a story.


...

All of which I unfortunately, sit on the only one end of the see-saw. Either that, or I am not even sitting anywhere near a see-saw.

Yup, this is a dilemma that all university students face: Academic writing.

What is academic writing?

It is writing in a defined framework, writing with references left right up bottom center. It is writing the way I DON'T normally write.

Now I kinda regret choosing all those stories to write back when I was in primary and secondary school...

And yes, sometimes I am stubborn enough to want to just say "whatever!" and stick to my own way. But of course, I am also stubborn enough to just want to learn this, write them and get it over and done with.

What a wonder to be both a perfectionist and a lazy bum.


(And what do you know? The wonders of new desktops and keyboards which keeps on hanging on the 'R's. So I have to deliberately punch every letter...not unlike an old typewriter.)

And I was sitting in class this morning, trying not to let my mind wander.

(The more I think of it, the less I like this keyboard that I am typing on. Maybe it just doesn't like me either.)

I kinda miss Form 6 where it was stressful yet you understand what the stress is all about, and so you can laugh about it.

Right now, I feel really stressed, I know 90% of what's the stress is all about, but I can't laugh about it.


Come to think of it, I do miss Sherry's narcissistic praises and sarcasm which then gets taunted back by Larry, Ooi Jin, Siu Fai and Kean Sheng. (Oh! The brain is not a muscle. How we fondly remember them in black and white) I do miss Li Qin's "bloody hell" (did I just typed that in?!)...hahaha...and Ooi Jin's kiasu-ness and his reminder that STPM is coming soon. Was coming, to rephrase that.

Ah, nostalgia nostalgia. Why does art thou impress thyself upon me?


Sometimes I just feel so uninspiring, which then I put a wry smile to it.

And this is not even close to formal writing. What an unhumourous joke.

Stylo-milo

I am so happy yesterday. So happy today.

I went and splurge on past styles and current styles...

(clockwise) silver skinny belt (RM10/=), white fat belt (RM6.32/=), Esarli's white shoes (RM39.92/=), necklace (RM20/=), white skinny belt (RM14.../=), brown shirt ...with a bit of LACE! (RM29.90/=), scarf headband (RM6.32/=) and two pair of identical earrings to mix and match (RM 4/= each)

Cheap enough leh...most of the stuff are from Ikano and Curve.

Please let me know where to shop in Singapore that won't kill the budget and won't be overly expensive...it is Christmas season you know. :)

Anyway...yeah, I'm trying on a new fashion style so I don't look like a drab at uni or outside. But the makeup still not so heng yet lah.

stylo-milo...hehehe....hahahahahha....looking at this picture just makes me laugh. omg, rebekah, didn't know you're like that. so narcissistic.

Woohoo...woohoo...

But I still need more shirts. And a handbag.



Yes, yes. I'm a girl, I like shopping. So sue me.



And I always wonder why people don't comment in my COMMENT box....but in my CHATbox. It's pretty interesting a study.


I'll prob post another last post before I head down south. As for now, HAVE A GREAT HOLIDAY!


Sing to the tune of ..."I'll be home for Christmas..." blues style.


And I love Christmas!

Ah!! Bug! Irritating ... bskdhasdpfhasdasduasdiopas...

It started as a nice week.

Not that it still isn't.

Or maybe it has become less of an enjoyable week.

I did want to write something about a lot of things I observed in human behavior this week, but decided against it.

Because...

I'm starting to really dislike Windows Live Messenger.

So yeah, I'm dumb enough to open the infected file sent by a contact. I actually had this coming in a few times by someone else. But that time I was so busy I have no time to open it. Then I was free enough.

바보 바보 바보 (fool...)

All these jobless people. I honestly don't understand what is the purpose of creating these spams and viruses and trojans and whatnots. Either they are too free, or they are desperately wicked. I think it's quite of both.

I am currently using another PC at home to do my assignments. Thank God for another working computer. But I am not using MSN anymore...well, at least not for now. Until my main PC cleans up all crap there is, I'll not be online in MSN.

You want proof? I already uninstall the MSN.

And I am currently quite limited to just finishing my written assignments. The ones that need design and authoring will have to wait.

왜요? 나 어떻게? (why? how?)


아, 몰라 몰라 ! (ah, whatever!)

Yeah, but that doesn't matter to you right? So, let's get back to something less dreary and more cheerful.

I finally went shopping on last Saturday!

This season's fashion is either too mature or too un-me. But I love their shoes! Woohoo...

I finally cut my hair on Sunday!

I'll post a picture my sister and I took months ago when eating at my-wish-came-true Korean BBQ at SS2. :) A happy picture for a dreary computer day.

me, my sister.

That was my hairstyle: messy, disorganised, uncut.

This is the reason why I want to buy Canon Powershot A570 IS.

Vincent say I should wear specs. For what reasons I forgot. I got this freaky feeling that it isn't a good one.

But what do you think of me new hairstyle? (to Sherry: Don't say I look like Karen Cheng.)


By the way, I am actually asked to advertise abit.

Haha.

I never understand why open days are called open days.

Nevertheless, APIIT UCTI is having another open day this weekend (15 and 16 December) from 10 am - 4 pm....so if you are interested in IT, business, international business management, media, web media technology, computer games development, engineering, software engineering, multimedia...do drop by at the campus in Technology Park Malaysia. The main collaboration university is UK's Staffordshire University.

More info please visit: www.ucti.edu.my or www.apiit.edu.my or call +603-8996 1000.

I am studying media informatics by the way. You think I advertise for all colleges meh...just mine.


Update (10:25 pm at today): I have finished cleaning up the whole PC. Thank God the antivirus and all other stuff detected some malware. Anyway, I'm back on MSN...8.2 beta. Nicer looking. And at least no more sending outs. And popping boxes. Next time I'll be wiser. I hope.

A Squeeze of Creativity

I am not sure if I use the right words.

I actually contemplated of quitting writing altogether.

总觉得自己没有那个天分，学中文有什么用呢？学人家写歌又有什么意义呢？我有那机会吗？创得出一首超棒的歌吗？闯得进歌坛吗？还是我一厢情愿，发白日梦？有时候觉得真傻。

Always felt I don't have the gift, so what's the point of learning Chinese? What's the point of learning others and writing songs? Do I have that chance? Am I able to create a super good song? Can I get into the music market? Or is it just a daydream? Sometimes I feel quite silly.

Oh well.

Either way, I've written a few choruses recently. Yeah, you've got that right. I have only written the chorus. And it's plural. Have fun while I consider stopping songwriting.

我还爱着你
爱得不退
是你影响我释放不到的罪
我还想念你
与我曾有的甜蜜
但你离别那话
让我来不及筹思我下一句

RT:
I am still loving you
Loving you till I cannot back down
It's your fault that I cannot let go (very roughly translated here)
I am still missing our once sweetness
But the words you said during your leaving
Left me unable to consider my next sentence

一步一步往前进
太靠近
我不欢迎
不要拿爱当理由
叫我要听
我怀疑你真的爱我吗？
你的解释我不接受
不想听
不要逼迫我还没准备的心
我的感情不是当你玩具

RT:
One step closer
And you're too close
I am not welcoming it
Don't take love as a reason
To make me listen to you
I wonder if you really love me
I don't accept your explanations
I don't want to hear them
Don't force my unready heart
My emotions aren't for you to toy with

有
你牵着我的手
爱带我们一起走
到时间的尽头
爱
永不止息的爱
仿佛把我们的心拥抱起来
我们永远直死再也不分开

RT:
You are there to hold my hand
Love leads us on
Till the end of time
Love
The unfailing love
As if embrace our hearts
Till death do us part we will be forever together


Horny, yeah.

Sweet, maybe.

Emo, maybe.

Writer's block, yes.

Will I continue? Maybe.

Amnesiac

Isn't it a wonderful time.

Here I am speaking Cantonese, Hokkien, Mandarin, English, Malay, Korean and Japanese all rolled into one. Yes-lah, it's rojak of all rojaks.

Assignments had been pressurizing till I don't have time to go shopping or cut my hair...or, at least I must look for free space in my schedule.

好烂也! (So terrible.)

So I shall take a Sunday off and go chop my hair.

I recently did two interviews for a tutorial. So cool right, I have to do a short video and podcast for tutorials...

So I shall post my video up.

(P/S: Don't be so critical to me lah okay...this is my first time doing video and I didn't know how to do it. And to the two leading actor and lady, sorry I didn't get your name. So if you are a blog reader, do drop a message to say, "Hey, that's me lah." :) For real lah...don't ask me for copyright fee. Hehe. Thanks very much though!)

Happy happy.


Back to assignments.


I actually have many things to say. Honestly, I do. I wanted to say that I forget things easily, especially if once I write it out and times passed.

Wait, what did I say?

Well, there ARE many things I want to do before 2007 ends. One is to go shopping. I desperately want to go shopping. Let me say it again:

I WANT TO GO SHOPPING!

I am desperate.

Another is to chop my hair. I mean, cut. Maybe dye it purple. Haha, just kidding.

I also want to finish at least two assignments before 2007 ends. Honestly, I really do. I don't want to get too stressed up anymore. (Right, I have three more to go.)

Next,

I want to end 2007 with a bang. 2007 has been a cool year for me. Though there are some glitches along the way, but 2007 generally had been good. Especially that this year I am able to grow closer to God (I hope.) and not feel like the glummest person in the world.

아짜! 파이팅! (Fighting! It's actually Pa-i-ting, not Hwaiting...but oh well, who am I to question that??)

So 2007 should end on a great note. I just hope nobody come up to me and 告白 (confess) and totally freak me out. So, you want to freak me out, do it after my exams...or maybe after Chinese New Year...or maybe after my birthday...or at least after I finish my degree...or after my convocation. Or maybe after I buy a Mac laptop. Or maybe after I realise my dream to either become a lyricist and then a singer (hahahaha..yeah right.) or become a screenwriter and then a director. (hahahahaa...even yeah right.)


Now, what else I want to do...

Too many things.



What did I say just now?

Ah, I have many things I want to do before 2007 ends.

Well, for one, I want to go shopping! I'm desperate! I really want to go shopping and buy things! Let me say it again......................................................................................................................................

Restless Leg

I used to think that Restless Leg Syndrome is if the leg can't stop moving.

And I found out, that it is the leg can't moving. But it's more than that.

What more, it's considered as a sleep disorder.

Sleep disorder as in insomnia, sleep apnea, snoring, etc.


But I think I do have that disorder.

It was a Friday.

I had a nice fellowship meal of cheese naan with a cup of ice lemon tea.

Heavy?

Not really.

However, I couldn't sleep that night.


Then my left calf becomes irritated.

It becomes uncomfortable. Not painful, but it's like pins and needles, but not really. It's like as if there's a blood clot at the leg, but not so. It just feels irritatingly uncomfortable.

And since my threshold for pain is nil, my threshold for uncomfortableness is also not high.

So the whole night I couldn't sleep. I toss and turn. I keep on wanting to move my leg. I walked out of my room, almost wanting to massage my leg with the iSqueeze. But 4 o'clock in the morning...

Fine. So I didn't sleep until 5.30 a.m. I only had 5 hours of sleep.

Sigh.

And I am so irritated with the fact I can't sleep that I looked up my symptoms. (Yeah, the wonder of Flash and medical websites.)


And I stumbled unto this site.

And I found out that having a heavy meal before sleep...

Will bound to make me have my RLS.



No more supper for me then. Goodbye mamak.

Be A Girl

Last night, or rather this morning, I couldn't sleep. Ended up only sleeping 5 hours starting from 5 in the morning.

Sigh. The things that we do.

Have been frustrated with assignments lately. Kind of stressed but not stress and totally like whatever.

I've added Karen Cheng and she added me to her Facebook! Hahaha...now I got a blog celebrity as a Facebook friend... la la la...

I realised that the blouse that fits me the best (supposedly) is ruffled or anything rouch/ruch at the front or the collar. But that would mean this:

picture from www.kaboodle.com

This means I have to wear feminine stuff....

Not that I cannot pull that style off, but rather....

I do mind wearing these kind of stuff.

Cause I may have to doll up to look like this:

picture from www.mylittlecloset.com.sg

Imagine me in that...


However, if it's something like this, it's still fine gua...but a little oldish looking.

picture from i1.yesstyle.com

It's hard to be a girl sometimes.

Okay, at least I can wear the scarf around the head like that and look more feminine and less tomboyish or plain.


Big hoop earrings, here I come!



(Yes, I am quite desperate to get at least 5 new outfits to wear to college. I am in Level 2 after all and after 21, so I must up my wardrobe a bit....)



And there's always the ever stylish and cute looking Jeon Do-Yeon in Lovers In Prague.

picture from www.blike.net
Yoon Jae-Hee (Jeon Do-Yeon) and Choi Sang-Hyuk (Kim Joo-Hyuk)

I love the 'Lovers' trilogy...though I haven't watch the last installment 'Lovers' yet. But I love 'Lovers in Paris' and 'Lovers in Prague'... 사랑해 사랑해!

picture from club.tour2korea.com
Kang Tae-Young (Kim Jung-Eun) and Han Ki-Joo (Park Shin-Yang)

Not to mention also 'To Marry A Millionaire' and 'Sweet 18'....사랑해 사랑해!

picture from img.sbs.co.kr
Kim Young-Hoon (Go Soo) and Han Eun-Young (Kim Hyun-Joo)


picture from www.japanza.com
Yoon Jung-Sook (Han Ji-Hye) and Kwon Hyuk-Joon (Lee Dong-Gun)

Yes, I love these dramas. And I so hope to have them as a collection...*hint hint.

Anywayz.

Realise that all these have happy endings...though LIParis was a bit odd, but nevertheless, it's still happy ending. Yay yay yay...


I found out that 제이 (J) sang a single for a horror movie. But the whole song is totally the wrong mood for the show. It's more like for some drama like Hello, God!.


Nevertheless, I like the song. For horror movie or not.


Now me want go shop shop.

It's The Emotions

你，　找不到我了吧？
對你這樣真的很對不起
我也不清楚自己的情緒
我知道你和我只能做朋友
這是你暗示的
我明瞭了
我只能默默地祝福你
你一定要幸福
我也不會再喜歡你了

RT:

You can't find me, can you?
To treat you like this, I'm really sorry
I know you and I can only be friends
This is what you subtly told me
I understand
I can only silently bless you
You must live happily
And I won't like you anymore.

非常抱歉
對不起
我並不是那白馬王子
怪就要怪我不夠體貼
我們一起你不會快樂地
非常抱歉
你走吧
你更會找到幸福快樂
愛我是個錯誤
你不要再愛我
我並不是你想的那個人

愛我是個錯誤
你不要再愛我
因為更愛你的他在等著

RT:

I'm really sorry
Sorry
I'm not your prince in shinning armor
It's my fault to not be so gentleman
You won't be happy if we are together
I'm really sorry
You should leave
You will definitely find more happiness
Loving me is a mistake
Don't love me anymore
I'm not what you think

Loving me is a mistake
Don't love me anymore
Because he who loves you more is waiting


好悲傷哦!

今天就比較低情緒點．　我還在笑著．

(So emo!)

(Today's a little low in emotions. But I'm still smiling.)

Don't worry about me. As the title says: It's The Emotions.

Seriously, I'm not feeling emo now.




Talking about emo, I want to go SHOPPING!


Yes, the shopping itch is back and so is the SALE!


好高興哦! (So happy...)

Bored? No.

Just want to up my meme section. Haha. Lame. I know.

Trying not to feel depressed now, happy?



4 Jobs I ever had in my life:

~ JC receptionist
~ JC teacher helper
~ Secret Recipe office assistant
~ Telemarketer


4 places I have lived:

~ Shah Alam
~ Taman Mayang Jaya
~ Taiping
~ Ipoh

(it says lived. Not living.)


4 countries I have been to on vacation:

~ Singapore
~ Hong Kong
~ Thailand
~ Malaysia

4 of my favourite food:

~ anything with FISH! :) Love fish...especially filet-o-fish.
~ Fries
~ Pork ribs... hahaha...
~ Lamb chop!

4 places I would rather be right now:

~ Toronto, Canada
~ Narnia
~ Seoul, South Korea
~ Taipei, Taiwan


6 Weird things about me:
1. I am a perfectionist, yet my room is very disorganized.
2. I wish people will come up with more creative memes than this.
3. I critically analyze every advertisement & commercial I see.
4. I like to maintain a very cool face about everything, as in unemotional. But that doesn't seem to be working.
5. I always like to imagine story ideas when I'm in the car or any vehicle that is moving.
6. I must always say what I want to calculate out loud, but never seem to be able to compute it in my head at the same time. So I can say "What's 40-20?" and I cannot process it in my brain at the same time. Yes, even if the maths is as simple as 40 minus 20.


(hmm....have I done this? Oh well.)

November, 1997

1) How old were you? eleven.
2) Where did you go to school? yuk chai, pj
3) Where did you work? i own my own country.
4) Where did you live? taman mayang jaya
5) Where did you hang out? playground
6) Did you wear glasses? no
7) Who was your best friend? forgot.
8) How many tattoos did you have? none
9) How many piercings did you have? a pair at the ear lobes.
10) What car did you drive? i fly on the bike.
11) Had you been to a real party? yeah, during World Children's Day. Whatever happened to that? I want a World Children's Day again...
12) Had your heart broken? what was that?

November, 2002

1) How old were you? sixteen. form 4.
2) Where did you go to school? smkdj
3) Where did you work? my country crumbled and disappeared. so i have no choice but study.
4) Where did you live? same place.
5) Where did you hang out? playground. HAHA... nolah. erm. CF most definitely. school canteen.
7) Who was your best friend? the other 6 cengalians, amanda, liza, mae, brian, a bunch of others i cannot quite remember now.
8) Who was your regular-person crush? form 4...hmmm...i think it was a tall guy. but i also think it's someone else. ah, yeah, that fella. suave, charming, speaks cantonese...oh well.
9) How many tattoos did you have? none.
10) How many piercing did you have? still the same.
11) What car did you drive? legs.
12) Had you had your heart broken? yeah. the fella broke it.

November, 2007
1) How old are you? twenty one.
2) Where do you work? at home and uni.
3) Where do you live? pjU, ara jaya.
4) Do you wear glasses? yeah, for computer screen purposes. it's actually very lightly tinted sunglasses.
5) Where do you hang out? 1U, curve, ikano, church, mamak, uni...Giant Kelana Jaya....HAHAHHA...yea.
6) Who is your best friend? li qin, sherry, carissa, chia pei, paulynn, nick, siu fai?, liza, manda, ... God.
8 ) Do you talk to your old friends? yes. no. depends on how old is old.
9) How many piercing do you have? same.
10) How many tattoos? none.
11) What kind of car do you drive? MANUAL kelisa.
12) Has your heart been broken? nope. don't want to open it for now. sick of liking someone and not having him liking you back at the same time.



Layer ONE: On the Outside
Name: rebekah lee cj / chajjye
Birth Date: 20th AUGUST, not october.
Current status: single, approach with guts and caution and backup heart.
Eye Color: brownish black. don't know.
Hair Color: black with blondish, brownish highlights.
Righty or Left: right
Zodiac Sign: roar.

Layer TWO: On the Inside
Your Heritage: chinese
Your Fear: heights (falling) and cockroaches, esp them flying ones.
Your Weaknesses: being too melancholy at times.
Your Perfect Pizza: crunchy crust, cheesy, and lots of pineapples.

Layer THREE: Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow
Your thoughts first waking up: must..turn...off...alarm...TOBYMAC!
Your bedtime: 12,1,2,3 am.
Your most missed memory: eating cinammon roll when i was young at subang parade.

Layer FOUR: Your Pick
Pepsi or Coke: vanilla coke or pepsi twist...used to be pepsi blue. but no longer exist.
McD or Burger King: mcDs
Single or Group Dates: group
Adidas or Nike: vincci, hahaha...i mean...sport shoes wise, skechers gua.
Lipton Tea or Nestea: green tea
Chocolate or Vanilla: VANILLA! and dark chocolate only.
Cappucino or Coffee: don't drink coffee. latte if you must.

Layer FIVE: Do You...
Smoke: nope. we hates it.
Curse: erm. does "nandatayo" and "what in the world" and "monkey" count?

Layer SIX: In the Past Month
Drank alcohol: nope.
Gone to the mall: yes, want to go shopping during YES!
Been on stage: yes...eh, past month ah. No wor.
Eaten sushi: nope.
Dyed your hair: highlighted.

Layer SEVEN: Have You Ever?
Played a stripping game: no.
Changed who you were to fit in: quite normal sometimes.

Layer EIGHT:
Age you're hoping to be married: depends whether there is that right guy that fits the bill. if not, just leave it as it be. single's cool.

Layer NINE: In A Guy/Girl
Best Eye Color: dark
Hair Color: depends. ang mo or chinese?
Short or Long Hair: short hair. definitely.

Layer TEN: What Were You Doing?
1 minute ago: meme-ing.
1 hour ago: meme-ing.
4.5 hours ago: sleeping
1 month ago: still relaxing.
1 year ago: stressed over assignments.

Layer ELEVEN: Finish The Sentence
I love: great cinematography, plot and film score + soundtrack.
I feel: a little depressed and stressed out. that's why i am doing this.
I hate: me being hypocritical.
I hide: my joy and always showing I am melancholy.
I miss: a train ride.
I need: money to shop.


Okay. Enough with memes.

"We're On The Yellow Brick Road..."

I still remember my fascination with the Wizard of Oz, back when Judy Garland stepped into a Technicolor world from her black and white Kansas.

picture by game-research.com

I still remember my fascination with the Chronicles of Narnia, when they showed Lucy stepping into the ice and snow-capped landscape from the furry wardrobe. I mean, the wardrobe with many fur coats.

picture by content.answers.com

I would like to see how Malaysian movies can do better with their cinematography and art direction.

I believe we have the technology.

picture by tms.org

And I believe if we really wanted to create a Titanic or a Lord of the Rings sized of production, we can do it.

picture by thecia.com.au

But...


We have yet much to improve upon.



Maybe I should go to film school.


Lalala...

Here's one to Sherry.

picture by allmoviephoto.com

WooHoo

Finally got my copy of TobyMac's Portable Sounds!

I looked everywhere except One Utama for this.

So I went 1U to look for something else a.k.a Love Actually.

To my chagrin, there is nowhere that has Love Actually.


So, fine. I go to MPH first, then I was so elated to see this:

WooHoo! I forgot about Love Actually for a while and buy this straightaway.

Yay yay...now I got his album....yay yay yay...


But I never got Love Actually though I ran through all the movie shops in 1U. Love Actually seems to be actually...missing. There isn't a single CD/VCD/DVD about Love Actually. There is 'The Holiday' but that's not the show I need to watch for assignments.

Gosh, is it too restricted that they can't sell it?

I couldn't find S'kali also.


What is wrong with all these shops?


This is a cool video of Feelin' So Fly by TobyMac in his new album Portable Sounds. It's done during their tour break.

...You got me feeling so fly
There ain't a day that goes by
A supernatural high
Oh my goodness - people I can't deny....

....time to go groove to his music...woohoo!

XJP

Will be going down to Singapore.

I know, I've said before I don't really like Singapore. I prefer Hong Kong, but that doesn't mean I am boycotting that place. I just want to go see their museums, attractions (not Sentosa) and others that Singapore can offer.

Actually quite looking forward to sitting a train again, especially night train. I always like trains. Got nostalgic feeling.

Actually I can't really say that Singapore don't bring good memories. The reason I don't like Singapore is purely the 环境 (environment) that doesn't fit with me. (Hint: it's too clean. no dirt at all! I have stayed too long in Malaysia to appreciate a little mess. Not too much, but a little disorganization makes it human.) But Singapore has good memories for me. For memories wise, I like both Singapore and Hong Kong. :) (what a contradictory person. like, then don't like...fickle fickle.)

picture from www.votrubicon.org

I remember when I was young like about 3 years old, I went down to Singapore with my family. I had my first McDonald's Filet-O-Fish in the familiar dark cyan old packaging. It was since then I have loved Filet-O-Fish till today.

I also remembered taking the train down. It was night time, I was so excited, I remember the bunk beds, it was like yesterday I just took the train. I remember waking up dazed looking out and remembering the place called "Woodlands".

Those are the most significant moments. The rest? Only through pictures I remember. We visited lots of places...the zoo, the rock museum...(HAHA...don't ask me why. The museum had rocks. Just rocks.)

So Xin Jia Po has quite a number of memories...but...maybe it's just me. I felt almost like a convict when I crossed the road without any zebra crossing when I visited Singapore back in 2001. Shhh...Don't tell anyone else. Haha...strict rules. In Kuala Lumpur, ... to Timbuktu with all those traffic lights and zebra crossings and pedestrian bridges. Got road? No car? Cross! Run!

Yes. What a wonderful country we live in.

Then, Singapore racers/drifters would love to come into Malaysia to race on our highways.



Singaporeans.

A Pause In Time

It was childish of me to get so frustrated with a problem I can solve.

But I shall not regret that frustration. It is through that, I find the truth of my life and the solution to it.

Very beautiful, will talk about it next time. It has to do with a sudden outburst of frustration in tears and ending up with keying Proverbs 3: 5 - 6 into my phone.

What a wonderful God I have!


Anywayz.

I shall work from back. I always love to work from the solution. Even with maths. Give me the end solution and the problem and I will give you the middle gist. Hahaha...so cheating right. That's why I loved that trigonometric proving question. It's tough as me playing Halo (cause I never play) but I already have the solution.

Yeah, I am always one for spoilers. Lazy lazy.

But since I am so bent on wanting to make a short film that my whole day and night is just consumed by it, (well, almost.) I will work with my lecturer to work backwards. Never mind that problem first, solution later. Cause now I can't think of a problem or question. So, work backwards.

I have been thinking what a jack I am sometimes. Jack as in jack in many trades, master of none.

Honestly.

I am good in singing, but not A-Mei or Fish Leong good.

I know I have some talent for writing songs, but my Chinese inhibits me to become like Vincent Fang.

I know I can play by ear and so play the piano and guitar, but I didn't finish my training. So I am stuck in Grade 5 and never up much like Michael Wong or Penny Tai.

I am good in writing, but I am no Chong Sheau Ching or Yasmin Ahmad.

I know I have a knack for directing or all that, but I'm no Yasmin Ahmad.

I know how to create graphics, but I can't go further. I am not even Enoch Liew good. :P


I mean, I'm not comparing myself to them lah. They are like so good in what they do and yes, I can learn to be that good. But get this: I can do many things, but it's gonna be average in media eyes or as best as how I can do it. That's why I say I'm jack of many trades, master of none.

No, I'm not being self-piteous or low self-esteem or melancholic. I am being practical. Currently, I am limited by me being jack of many trades and master of none. None! Not even one!

So yeah. It's pretty sad and yet, challenging. Cause now I have a choice. Either to be master of all or master of one or master of two. I am not going to stick with jack of all trades, master of none again.

But whether or not it comes true, that depends on me now, doesn't it?

So Fast.

Now I'm back to square one.

I realised that now I am on the wrong track again. I am focusing on short film as a the media form. NOT the FYP.

So now I have to squeeze my brain again to LOOK for an opportunity or whatever that can be researched, that is challenging, that will solve a problem.

And I still have to come up with an end-product. Film or not.



And currently, my brain can't think of anything.

Suddenly, I feel as if I should have taken film and television production instead of this course.

Not that this course isn't good.

I'm just totally, crappily, unhappily unable to think of any ideas.



I think I shall go and sleep.

As the good epitome says: When you can't think of anything, sleep. It sure helps to clear your brain.

picture by gettyimages.com

I am not in the wrong course. I just want to do another course. Maybe. Don't know lah. Now I want to go back to film production. Before that I wanted to go into the Chinese music industry. So confusing. I know, I'll get a triple degree!


As the good Hokkien-speaking community will say: "Siao zha bo." (crazy woman)


Sigh.


yes, sleep.

Short Film

Most probably be creating a short film for my FYP (final year project). I even started a blog for the production notes! HAHA. What an ambitious fella. Anywayz, will be recording my frus and my joys about this FYP. Most of the time I will be only writing in a few short paragraphs. On the other hand, I've said to myself last night, or rather, this morning: "I am a jack of many trades, master of none."

Well said. Here's the site address:
http://penningchajjye.blogspot.com

OMG...

These are the things that will shock you sometimes...though it shouldn't. He was after all, one of the shy heartthrobs in SMKDJ...

How the story started?

I was leafing through my sister's Female magazine and it was that issue that has their 50 gorgeous people.

Well well well....what do you know. Before that, I actually stumbled upon a very familiar face.

I found out that "Eh, that's Phoebe!" Yeah...old school friends. Was very surprised to see her there. Wah...now become model. So chun.

And I thought the surprise ends there. Mana tau (how would I know) there's a bigger surprise awaiting.

I was going through the 50 gorgeous and then I saw this picture:

And I was thinking, looks cute...wait a minute. He looks familiar...then I saw the name:

OMG...it's John-Son Oei! The guy from SMKDJ last time! We used to talk! He used to attend the same church! He used to be in my cell group! His brother used to be in my cell group! We used to talk! He used to wear specs! ... He was thinner then. Wah...

picture from femalemag.com.my

Now he's one of Female's 50 Gorgeous People.

What a small world. Not that we talk now lah. But still.


So, if you like him. Please click here. :)


See, now, you have officially voted for him. :)


What a gimmick.

But seriously, I did know John-son. Then. He and his brothers have one of those unique name combinations like Yun's parents. Nice, interesting parents.

And if he wins, you do get to meet him and other gorgeous finalists...lots of eye candy. Haha...

Horrr....naughty naughty.


Talking bout shy heartthrobs, my cousin brother seems to be one. When he was down in KL the other time, gosh, so many girls stared at him for so long, it was like as if Brad Pitt/Lee Hom/Prince William/Zac Efron/Orlando Bloom (okay, so maybe not everyone of you like him)/(name your heartthrob here __________________) landed in front of them. Even his sisters were mildly disgusted by it. I still remember the description my mom made: "They are also already drooling!" But my cousie is a very very very very very shy boy. But also very sweet. Very gentleman and chivalrous.

Lalalalala...


Edit: this Eddie Peng looks so cute in his portrayal as Yang Qi Lang (click to see picture) in Shao Nian Yang Jia Jiang (no, not the war picture.). He's the youngest kid in the family, before his eighth sister, so he's a bit spoiled. But he does look very cute and mischievous as compared to the more solemn Yang Si Lang played by Peter Ho (which later in 2007 he played the oh-so-chivalrous-Liang-Shan-Bo!)

Funeral

Remember I written once about writing a funeral song?

Well, here it is.

鍾聲敲著十二午夜
我躺在床上臥不安
腦海里有你的影像
不斷地返回飄揚

我寂寞不是第一次
只是這次會較孤單
我發現我無法掉淚
默傻地等到天亮

你離開的時候
沒有那熟悉的笑
天雖然沒黑了
但我卻已明瞭

我牽不到你的手
永遠聽不到你的笑
離開人間是祂安排
不能再回來
我唯一選擇就是放開
你必定是更快乐
天堂多了你一個天使
你不用為我擔憂
我一定會好好地活下來
把心門給敞開

我數你離開的日子
一天一夜漫長過去
我想念你扮的鬼臉
常凝結在相片里

沒有你少了嬉笑聲
氣氛也不覺得熱烈
我站在陽台邊嘆息
淚眼凝霜哭不起

你離開的時候
沒有那溫柔目光
天雖然沒降雨
但我卻已明瞭

上帝啊求祢賜力量給我
讓我不再狼狽
安心地讓她走

我牽不到你的手
永遠聽不到你的笑
離開人間是祂安排
不能再回來
我唯一選擇就是放開
你必定是更快乐
天堂多了你一個天使
你不用為我擔憂
我一定會好好地活下來

真希望能重來

Rough translation:
The clock sounds at 12 midnight
I lie in my bed, can't sleep
There is your image in my mind
Going back and forth non-stop

This is not the first time I'm lonely
Only this time I will feel more alone
I find that I can't cry
Silently wait for the morning

When you left
There wasn't that familiar smile
The day didn't turn dark
But I already understand

I can't hold your hand
I can never hear your laugh
He's the One who plans the departure from living
There's no returning
My only choice is to let go
You must be happy now
The heavens seem to have added one more angel/saint
Don't worry about me
I will live on well
I will maintain an open heart

Counting the days you are gone
A day a night seems to drag on
I miss the silly faces you make
When you take a picture

Without you, there seem to be a lack of happiness
The atmosphere seem to lack its shine
I stood at the balcony and sigh
My tears seem to be frozen, I can't cry

When you left
There's no longer that soft, gentle eyes
The day didn't rain
But I understand

God, please give me strength
Don't let me look so dejected
Let me let her go

I can't hold your hand
I can never hear your laugh
He's the One who plans the departure from living
There's no returning
My only choice is to let go
You must be happy now
The heavens seem to have added one more angel/saint
Don't worry about me
I will live on well

I wish I could start all over again



Yes, sad. I know. It's a guy song. Now, I just need a composer....

Making A Movie

I realised that actually this semester isn't so screwed-up after all. Well well, what do you know?

Cause now, the media students are free! ... to do whatever they want, as long they can deliver the end-product.

Yeah, I'm talking about end-product.

I really want to step into the waters of making a short film at about 20 minutes.

But looking at the enormous amount of work and the lack of equipment, cash and skill, I am really unsure if I should do it.

I mean, I have done theater before, writing, directing and producing a 15-minute play. But that is not a one-man show. I had the whole of Upper 6 Seroja to help me.

Now it is to be a one-man show. And it requires more time, energy, money and skill. Cause now I have to write the screenplay, find the actors, set the budget & schedule, direct, make production sets if needed, record sound, compose music, synchronise, edit, integrate and film the whole thing myself.

WOW. That's a lot of work.

Someone please give me RM 10,000 so I can film without killing myself first.


Okay, okay. God will provide. So I don't need to kill myself at all.


So tell me, do you think this is a sane idea? Or am I just totally over my head?

As the good Koreans will say... "미쳤어???!!!!" ("ARE YOU CRAZY??!!!")

Itch

I don't know why I always face this problem:

Once I posted a post up, there seems to be something else unsaid..then I add on another post.


Like this one here.

I have to look through a company that uses new media business endeavors a.k.a virtuality, digital, interactivity, hypertext and dispersal.

Anyone knows one?

I am looking through and if Li Qin was in this assignment project together, she would go for the cutest name like Puppy Doodle Entertainment. Never mind the relevance.

Getting on with assignments. It's pretty sucky at the moment, I must say. I am totally clueless. This has got to be the most screwed-up semester yet. Thanks to subjects as confusing as Research Methods.

Lie Lie Lie

After that insensible cold joke, it's time for me to up a song I have written. Full song this time. In simplified Chinese too!

I wrote this song with just wanting to give an outlet to those girls who get cheated by their boyfriend over and over. Please, wake up from your dream. (Eh, I should write another song about that! :)) If he lies to you again and again, really, why are you settling for him? There are better guys out there, I believe. And that guy, repent you sinner. What if the tables are turned? You'd be tasting your own bitter medicine.

Ha. I'm sexist now. Haha.

那天我在公园
站在我们的树底下
名字的雕刻已被覆罩
模糊的刻影
就像我的心
剩下一丝的印象

我抓不到
渐淡薄的记忆
脑海中只充满
你昨天说的话

一切都是谎言
立诺言只是你的借端
使我爱上你的潇洒
遮盖我双眼
认为你真的爱我
我已经明了了
你留下的蛛丝与征候
真像个傻瓜
相信你的话
我不会一而再犯错

悲伤爱情的影片
仿佛变成了我故事
韩剧的主角正在掉泪
心中的苦涩
无话可形容
最好就是扮okay

你看不到
眼泪藏在眶里
一直安慰自己
别再为你煎熬

我的一份心已交给你
想念你不想念你
纸巾殷满垃圾桶
我不想往后看

RT:
That day I was in the park
I stood under our tree
Our names once carved have already been carved over/covered
The shadowy remains
Just like my heart
Only has a little significance left

I cannot grasp
The fading memory
My mind only could remember
The words you said yesterday

All these are lies
Making promises is only your excuse
To make me fall in love with you
My eyes are blinded
I thought you really love me
I finally understood
Those traces and hints you left
Just felt like a fool
In believing you
I won't repeat my mistakes again

Melodrama romance in the movies
Are becoming my story
The main character in the Korean drama is crying
The sorrow of my heart
Can't be described
The best is to just act okay

You can't see
The tears hiding in my eyes
Keep on encourage myself
Not to suffer for you again

I gave you a piece of my heart
To miss you or not
The rubbish bin is filled with tissue paper
I really don't want to look back



Lala...melo. I know. Not as melo as my funeral song. Hahaha.

Enjoy!

Once I can ace my singing and playing and have a home studio, I'll post up the proposed melody. Really, I am just a lyricist. It's not that easy to compose. I can direct MVs though. I love doing that..........................................................................


Drama queen...dreaming only.

edit: I just experienced a short wave of blackout. it's like my eyeballs are going to pop out from my sockets. Eugh.

The Day That Goes By...

picture taken by Jessica Yeap.

The one with the fedora hat speaks.

"Jika gajah jadi itik,

Jika ayam jadi itik,

Itik jadi apa?"


Everyone

please

support

my

songs

and

buy

for

me

a

Sony

digital

camera

like

the

T-10.

Isn't

it

fabulous?

Yeah

I

know

I

seem

to

be

running

out

of

topics

to

talk

about.

No?

Sorry-lah.

Will

talk

about

more

interesting

stuff

next

time

yeah?

You

can

get

me

a

Sony

digital

camera

like

the

T-10

for

a

start.

Hahahaha.

The

answer

to

the

riddle

is:

"Itik...jadi...















BANYAK!"

I

know

it's

lame.

I

heard

it

today.

Siu Fai was the one who said it. Even Allan couldn't take it. Hee.


If you are interested in him, please go and read this article and go vote for him in his blog. You have only 10 days left to vote.

Of All The Silly Things...

Did you read Kenny's post about his missing hamster?

Gosh, you should also read the comments. All the things they say.

I think the most hilarious one is this:


Okay, don't worry kenny, i am going to catch one RAT tonight, then colors it like your HAMSTER.


Poor Kenny.

Initiative

Just recently completed a song.

I know, most of you would be like "Another song?!"

Hey, I told you I write songs.

Then after that, I might take a break.

HAHAHA...




Whatever am I talking about. How can I ever take a break? Writing songs is my joy!


By the way, I got this question to ask every guy and girl:

I know girls are sometimes playing hard to get. And guys just seemed to be like "Should I make the first move or not? Cause I might look like I'm desperate." So all they do is glance, stare, try to make eye contact or even strain to listen to the girl's voice if they sit a few seats/rows away.

Honestly, if a guy keeps on staring at me, I would think, "Did I do my hair properly? Or I have a huge zit on the tip of my nose?" But nevertheless, I would be somewhat flattered. And scared. And curious. And wish that he would stop staring and glancing my way once in a while and start saying hi. Just be friends first. I know it's always that admiring/liking/loving-from-a-distance...but I always think that guys should always take the initiative. Girls like heroes. No, I'm not talking about the show. But I do know that many, if not all like someone to come up to them and compliment them or say hi. Someone who takes initiative.

(Girls can be seemed as desperate if they initiate/approach the guy first. Guys get freaked out!)

So yeah, chances are we might be just freaked out all the way back to Venus. It was like when this guy in the cafeteria said to me the other time "You look cute today." and I got a little Korean-like, almost giving him that "HUH?!" look. (For Korean fans, it's the "네?!" (neh?) or "뭐라고?!" (what?))

But though I have doubts about the line and the cute part, I smiled and thank him.

And honestly, not every girl know how to respond to those stuff, girls like me. And so sometimes I do doubt if those glances and stares are really for me or really that I look as if I just woke up and haven't comb my hair.

Either way, I think there should be a space for everyone to be a little cordial and friendly. Take up your guts, men, and say hi. Don't leave anonymous notes. I hate it when I don't know who the author is. It's annoying. Take up your guts and own up!

Not only so, I think girls should be allowed to be give signs that they are okay with the guy coming forward. It's not an easy task. Cause signs can be misread. But I believe if the girl returns your glances, gives you eye contact, smile to herself after that, it means: Approach with caution! It's okay, say hi to me.

So, my question is:

Would you like it if the opposite sex came up to you and said hi, instead of trying to get you looking at her/him or keep on glancing at you?

Generic question.



Preferably? I would rather you come up and say hi.

Staging Out

You know how we always talk about being cool, being popular, being all that...?

Honestly, when I was helping out the LOUD! concert in Dream Centre yesterday, I saw the XYZ Worship Team members up on stage leading worship and honestly, though I find Siu Fai's fedora/trilby hat reminded me so much of TobyMac , somehow I have this tiny tiny voice within me that said "I miss being up there."


this is tobymac.
pictures from itickets.com and trueartist.org

I know, I know. Don't point your fingers at me.

It's wrong. It's right. It's itching.

I enjoy and don't enjoy being on stage, using my talents.

I'm not perfect. I do get a little desire now and then to want to show off.


Yah yah..like I have anything to show off.

Juwita Suwito was superb though. That humbled me a bit.



Or not.


Just made me wanted to go and train my voice, write more songs and smile more.


Not bad, not bad. At least I want to improve.


So I'm not really ready for big stage. I got a mind of my own and sometimes I like to sing things my way. Yeah, not very submissive. But I think it would be good to start again. Just to humble myself. Funny how you need to be up to be humbled.






On the other hand, I wrote a funeral song.






*
**
***
****
*****
****
***
**
*







Yeah, sounds morbid. Not really.





p/s: when I said that SF's fedora/trilby reminded me of TobyMac, it's not a bad thing. In fact, he looks really cool in it. (will show the picture if I ever get my hands on any picture of the night concert) Like TobyMac. But of course got his own style lah...(after he feel a little "compared" :P) So, Siu Fai, keep up the good fashion sense! :P

Imagination

This week I am without any new songs.

I am forced to think creative.

No longer a quick judgment on things I see.

This is what happen when you are in this industry.

Giving you another snippet of one of my old songs. :) This is a pretty long song, I was thinking the melody as something nostalgic. A little Theresa Teng. Hehe.

사랑합니다
这是我的真心话
미안해요
别惦记我的过错
고맙습니다
有你无限的忍耐
我只能用这样的方法
来表达这三句话
唱着给你听呀

Rough translation:

I love you
This is from my heart
I'm sorry
Don't remember my wrongdoings
Thank you
For your unlimited patience
I can only use this way
To tell you these three sentences
By singing it to you


Don't think I write good songs. There are times I write bad songs. That is when I am desperate to write. So never write when you are desperate. :)

And that's a song for you!

Love Is...

If it comes to ballad, Tim Hwang wins hands down. I love his smooth vocals. Woohoo!

picture from wiselife.cn

picture from musictea.com


picture from asianlove.iespana.es

Sigh...so smooth. His vocals I mean.

song from his latest album: love is...

Anywayz. I'm rewriting my mystery novel. A little less realistic and a bit more American. I mean...I'm rewriting it again, cause the last time I tried to write again...I got writer's block, cause I wasn't sure what's the ending. Haha..


좋아해!! (I like!)

Men.

Picture from gettyimages.com

Sangat Ber-china

I know, sometimes people might not even know that I can speak Chinese or read, much less write them. So when I posted some of my written works up, some probably like, "Eh, you know Chinese?"...

Err..yeah. I'm a Chinese after all, Malaysian or not. I believe that every race should learn their mother tongue, though not necessarily to writing and reading, but at least know how to speak. Cause though I don't always support Chinese language (remember those Chinese school days? Oh my gosh, you could get nightmares...)

Yeah, it's that bad.

But I must say something I love about my Chinese culture:

The art. Whether it be music or martial arts or art art art...I love them all. Okay, maybe not so much of martial arts...but hey, it's the one point that made Americans wish that they could be Chinese.

Don't call me a Chinese patriot or whatever cause I'm not. I do love Malaysia very much, except the ridiculous things they do sometimes. That doesn't mean I'm not a Malaysian patriot. There's definitely always something to gripe about regardless which country you're in.

But yes, I love the Chinese art. I love restringed violins and cellos (replacing the normal strings with silk strings that Chinese musical instruments uses). I love the old fashion. I love the flying they sometimes do. I love their bamboo forests...I love their movies (not those old Shaw productions. That tickles me annoyingly.)...I love their stringed instruments....

The only art that I don't really like about Chinese art is calligraphy. Maybe it's because I never was good at it.

Bah.


Somebody please give the Hero soundtrack to me.


Photo from ent.sina.com.cn

I love grand epic film scores. So sue me.

Match Girl

Up another one. Very interesting way of saying about the Little Match Girl story.

Give you a little snippet.

(As opposed to my previous songwriting entries, I place the simplified Chinese version. Not everyone know how to read traditional Chinese. :) )

卖火柴女啊

你烧的亮光只是那一瞬间

你却拥抱那珍贵一刻

来现实你的希望

卖火柴女啊

短暂的光芒不让你再流泪

失去了才了解拥有时的宝贵

RT:
O Little Match Girl
The light you lighted was only for a moment
But you treasured that moment
To reach your dreams and wishes
O Little Match Girl
The momentary light caused you not to shed tears anymore
Only when we lost something we understand the importance of it

To quote "Big Yellow Taxi": But you don't know what you've got till it's gone

So you might know where I got my inspiration from lah. :)

Heartfelt

Been thinking of fantastic ideas lately. My lecturer had told us to expand our minds to the farthest limit.

After reading a screenwriting textbook by Ray Frensham, I am inspired to restart my writer's journey.

Some of you might say I don't write well. For those who has complimented about my songwriting skills, thanks! Don't get that everyday.

Anywayz. Of course ideas can just be an idea without "legs". Therefore, sometimes I am in all earnest to write a story, but then the story stuck and stales. It is quite hard to deal with all these. No?

I find solace in writing songs, I find better talent in writing them. Maybe because I am fond of writing poetry. With my Mandarin below average, I am flipping through dictionaries to find out which word fits best. :)

Whatever it is, everything written should come with research. Without research, ideas are very hard to grow its "legs".

Of course I don't say my writing skills are great. In fact, I believe in this post you can already find grammatical errors. But can I say, "Heck, this is an unprofessional blog. It'd be worse in Mandarin."?

I try my best. Though with time constraints now with the study load getting heavier (yeah, I get to watch the telly for homework and watch movies for assignments. No kidding.) and the piling up of my tutorials that never seemed to end...with an impending Final Year Project that apparently is going to start in my Level 2 Semester 3...I hope I don't stop writing, but I definitely will be writing less personal interest and more academical requirements.

Oh well. What's a student to do? So be thankful for the holidays you can get, you primary and secondary schoolers!

Hahaha.I sounded as if I am already working.

So what shall I do when I grow up???

This song was written during my holidays. It's one of my earlier songs and one of my proudest achievements cause I could have the tune to it...well, almost. It's not a love song. It still requires some editing from time to time, but it's a song inspired by the world.

活在這個世界上
翻開每天的報紙
都可以讀到氣餒
人的哀戚與恩怨

代代傳下來的仇
我們該何時擁有
彩麗平安的世界
愛已經不是重點

有寬恕嗎?
有博愛嗎?
有希望嗎?

我們緊緊地把我們雙手一起變拳頭
心里硬著不接受彼此的見解與差別
錯過的人應該要恨恨地以牙還牙
仁慈憐憫只是當作笑話

我們的拳頭根本不能容納任何甚麼
憤怒仇恨只能會把我們慢慢地銷毀
只能張開我們的雙掌我們才能找回
曾失過的自由曾失過的美

我們的拳頭根本不能容納任何甚麼
憤怒仇恨只能會把我們慢慢地銷毀
只能張開我們的雙掌我們才能體會
仁愛仁慈憐憫才是最完美

空著手你我才能感覺到
真愛的自由的美

Rough translation:
Living in this world
Flipping through the papers
We can read about disheartened hearts
People's sorrow and hate

The hate that passed down from generation to generation
When are we going to have
A beautiful peaceful world
Love seems to lost its significance

Is there forgiveness?
Is there love (agape)?
Is there hope?

We turned our palms into tightened fists
We harden our hearts, unable to accept each other's differences and opinions
The wrong person should be given tooth for tooth
Grace and mercy seemed more like a joke

Our fists cannot contain anything
Bitterness and hate will only destroy (burn) us from within
It's only by opening our hands that we can find
The freedom and love once lost

Our fists cannot contain anything
Bitterness and hate will only destroy us from within
It's only by opening our hands that we can understand
Love, grace and mercy is the most beautiful

Only by opening our hands you and I can feel
True love's beautiful release


Yeah, there's glitches in grammar. Oh well.