Inquisitive Curious

p/s: Writer is not in a very normal mood when she write this. Any offence made is thoroughly apologised and hope that it will be forgotten asap. No names are mentioned in this article.

I watched Rain Man. Did I mentioned that? Such an old movie. 1988!

Taking a break from studies now. Will start again next week. Can't wait to watch Spiderman 2 on DVD though.

Today, I was actually struggling with my own feelings. Anger that wells up in my heart was something I was all too familiar with. And it's really hard when you want to forgive somebody, but you just can't forget what did that person have done to you.

I think there is some things that some people don't get about me here. So whether you want to hear it or not, I'm gonna say it anyway. THis is MY blog. I will write what I want to write. No pun intended. I'm just in a conflict mood here.

Some people got the first impression that I am a very 'ganas' person. That's because I look solemn, strict and closer to that. Okay. It's only when they started working with me then they realise that oh, actually she's a crappy person. Haha...yeah, but whenever I don't like about something, I will just give that face and that tone and everyone will know that I am serious.

Some people think that I am too carefree. Correction! I have reasons to why I don't do things like how other do. I can't adapt changes well, though I do try to do that. I'm a super 'submissive' person, though some may think that I'm more rebellious. Maybe I am.

I AM stubborn. I AM curious about many things. I am someone who's a perfectionist, which I do almost hate myself in certain times. I AM a person who wants her rights.

But I am also someone who observes and watch closely especially on things that interests me. People, for one, is my subject. I love watching people, how they succeed, how they fail and how they rise up again.

And I am a very sensitive person. Call me 'perasaan' or whatever, but I don't like it either. It must be caused by my power of observation.

And I am a happy-go-lucky person. I love freedom, enjoyment, and fun.

I am a person who's organised: Place her things in specific areas, do things structurally unless too lazy, and takes certain initiatives.

Me? I am a trained delegate-r. I train up people, then straightaway, I put them on the road. Experience taught me to let go and let these people grow. Yes, I am reluctant in some ways, but somehow I don't like people too dependant. Yes, I am an independant girl, in some ways.

Hmm...what else? I don't speak my mind often, but I do think alot. And I mean A LOT.

I am a person born with many faults and still faulty. THough I tried to please everyone around me, I realise this is stressing me out and in the end, I'm wasting my energy cause nobody's gonna be pleased totally anyway.

Sounds as if I am in one angry mood now huh? Maybe. Maybe not. But I must admit, I am less rude than I was last time. Ask my sister. She'll tell you all my faults at home. Hahaha...

Of course, I do try to change. Day by day, month by month, year by year, I want to change. Maybe because of the perfectionist nature in me, I do neglect some other kinds of commitment, pick the wrong choices, screw up and argh!! Then regret. Oh yeah, I've been through that and back.

Wow, now I'm being honest. Stress does boost energy, don't they?

Hmm...voiced my thoughts. People who misunderstood me, just don't tell me that you are or were. People who never knew me, TA-DA! Ten Ten Ten...surprised?

I'm just saying all these because I am a sensitive person. That is my fault. I tend to take things/offences/whatnots seriously and I can actually contemplate about it for days! Not that it doesn't happen. My skin is just not thick enough. Well, once my face is as thick as the wall, I'll get back to you.

Wow, now I'm really honest.

Bekah, shut up!

Haha...

Anyway, if you feel that I was being too frank, I'm sorry. Just keep in mind, that I wasn't really talking bout you. Cause I don't know who reads this. Insult me, offend me, praise me, whatever. You can comment at Post A Comment. I won't take you by the neck and punch you till your face puffs up. Nay, I don't have the muscle to do that. It'll be good anyway, cause I'll train up my thick-skinness...go ahead, buddies, I'm ready!

p/s: Choo Yen, the photobucket thing is at the previous post. the one with the Give Me One Magnificent Obsession.


::Day and night I'll stick with GOD;I've got a good thing going and I'm not letting go::